Delulu&Devoted
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There was a time when I thought love meant losing myself in someone else’s world. You know the drill—romanticizing red flags, over-analyzing text responses, and rewriting my entire personality to match whatever aesthetic my latest situationship had going on. But plot twist: that was not the vibe. Now? Welcome to the Healed Girl Era—where we’re putting self-love first, and it’s giving main character energy like never before.
For so long, we’ve been fed this idea that love is the end goal. Disney princesses, rom-coms, and even TikTok couples had us thinking that if we just find the one, we’ll be complete. But Gen Z is flipping the script. Now, it’s about being the one for ourselves first.
We’re making self-love a priority—romanticizing our own lives instead of waiting for someone to do it for us. That means solo coffee dates, blasting our favorite playlists like we’re in a coming-of-age movie, and buying ourselves flowers just because. Because let’s be real: you are the love of your life. Everyone else is just a guest star.
Listen, healing isn’t just face masks and journaling with a matcha latte in hand. Sometimes it’s ugly crying in the car or realizing you need to unlearn patterns you thought were normal. It’s calling yourself out, holding yourself accountable, and knowing that growth isn’t always aesthetic.
The Healed Girl Era isn’t about being perfectly put together—it’s about choosing yourself even when it’s hard. It’s setting boundaries, leaving toxic relationships (romantic or not), and realizing that healing doesn’t mean you’ll never feel lonely—it just means you won’t settle for less because of it.
Once upon a time, the thought of being alone scared me. But here’s the thing: being alone doesn’t have to feel lonely. In fact, it can be empowering. The Healed Girl Era means embracing that solo time, learning who you really are outside of relationships, and realizing that your worth isn’t tied to whether someone else picks you. You pick you.
Dating yourself is a thing now, and honestly? It’s a flex. Treat yourself how you want a partner to treat you. Take yourself on cute little dinner dates, hype yourself up in the mirror, and invest in your own growth. Because when you do find love, it should be an addition to your happiness—not the foundation of it.
Don’t get it twisted—the Healed Girl Era doesn’t mean we’re out here rejecting love like it’s a scam. We still want romance, but we’re moving different. We’re choosing partners who add to our lives, not ones we need to fix. We’re holding people accountable for how they treat us and actually believing it when we say, “I’d rather be single than settle.”
At the end of the day, love should feel safe, exciting, and easy (not to be confused with boring—we love a little spice). The difference now? We’re not chasing, forcing, or accepting crumbs. If it’s not giving respect, effort, and emotional security, then it’s just not giving.
If there’s one thing the Healed Girl Era teaches us, it’s that you are the best thing that ever happened to you. And while love is beautiful, it’s even better when you already know your own worth. So here’s to setting standards, choosing peace, and remembering that the best love story you’ll ever have is the one you write for yourself.
Now excuse me while I go buy myself flowers and play a Lana Del Rey song like I’m the protagonist of my own indie film.
Welcome to the Healed Girl Era. It looks good on you.
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